On Thursday morning I woke up with a distinct feelinG in my stomach. And no, unfortunatly it wasn't butterflies. It was a feeling of sickening anticipation. AS Level results day.
They say that a lot can change in a year. But I think evan more can change in a day.
If you no me well you will no that I hate waiting for things, although I have patience with people, I hate waiting for things to happen, so I no what I am going to ultimately do.
On Thursday morning I woke up knowing that in a few hours my life was going one of three ways.
1. If i passed well enough to get into my second year of 6th form I would be continuing with my A levels and going to University next year.
2. Failure. Didn't get into 6th form, move to brighton to go to college there.
3. Yet more failure. Go travelling. Mum take a gap year and travel the world and then come back and take a journilism course.
I had options, that was the good thing. One of the reasons I love my mum is that she comes up with amazing options for me.
Another reason I love my mum is, that on Thursday morning, my mum came into my room and wished me luck and said 'At the end of the day, is it the worst thing if you fail? Youv'e had fun this year, its been life changing. And if you dont do very well, then you get to go travelling round the world'.
Then I started hoping that I had failed! How much better does it sound to go travelling around the world than to stay at 6th form for another year and stress myself out sooo much?
And it got me thinking. When people say 'When one door closes in life another door opens' they are right. I know it might not be true for everything, but when one door closes it opens windows, letter boxes, cat flaps etc. Maybe the lesser option might not be the worst. Maybe failure opens up routes to sucess. And maybe, just maybe, the door that seems the most scary fills you with enough adreniline to get you what you want in life.
In the end, I got enough in my results to stay on at 6th form next year.
Oh well, nevermind.
Evan if you dont open up those doors when you have the oppurtunity the first time, you may be able to save the key until when you are ready.
Look behind that door and see whats there. Whats the worst that could happen?